Jenyfer Matthews

I never dreamed I’d be gone from Egypt so long when we left on February 1st. I wasn’t really thinking much at all beyond get me out of here, but somehow I thought that we’d have a clearer answer on how things were going / how to proceed one way or another by the end of February.

Here it is already April and I am still not sure what to think.

In order not to drive myself insane with the what-ifs, I’ve been trying hard to be a bit more Zen, to take things one day at a time, not to get too far ahead of myself. If I can only get through this week… if I can only get through this month… if I can only get through the school year… maybe then I’ll know more about what happens next regarding whether I stay in the US with the children after the summer or whether we go back to Egypt so we can be together as a family while my husband looks for another job.

I had finally gotten to the point where I was resigned to drifting along for a while, trying to enjoy what Ohio has to offer in terms of entertainment and activities for the children, when reality butted in again: the school in Egypt wants to know whether or not we’ll be returning in the autumn so that they know whether or not to hold places for the children.

I understand why they need to know, but I’m not sure that my answer of how am I supposed to know will satisfy them. There are several variables that influence that decision and they themselves are subject to change at any time. Is it any wonder my shoulders are tense and I’ve got a sore tongue from industriously grinding my teeth at night?

There are many things to recommend staying in Ohio… but there are also reasons to go back to Egypt, at least for the short term. I’ll feel better once I make a decision – but then I’ll likely torture myself wondering whether or not it’s the right one…

In spite of my rather downcast attitude these last few weeks and not having much more motivation or energy than the creature at the left, I took advantage of the beautiful weather we had on Sunday and made a day of it with my children at the Cincinnati Zoo. Life and motherly duty go on after all.

(It actually wasn’t that much of a sacrifice once I got going)


Aren’t the tulips beautiful? In spite of the fact that they were not poppies, I almost expected the good witch Glinda from the Wizard of Oz to appear somewhere nearby. I’ve always wanted a pair of ruby slippers, and wouldn’t they come in handy right about now…

I haven’t seen quite so many flowers around town just yet and have never seen what I assume is a pussy willow in bloom growing in nature – I’ve only ever seen the dried twigs with their fuzzy buds in flower arrangements.

I am really hoping that all these flowers blooming mean that the worst of the cold winter weather is past us for the season.

The cat exhibits were closed because of renovation and the giraffes are on a maternity leave so we didn’t see some of the more “standard” zoo animals. We did see some “new” animals though. There were three manatees on exhibit, for instance, and I had never seen such tiny penguins before.

The leaf floating in the water on the left gives you an idea of just how small this cutie was!

You can always learn something new wandering around a zoo, reading all the informational notices that are posted all over. After reading about Komodo Dragons and how they hunt, my daughter announced to me that we could never go to Indonesia! Somehow I don’t think that is an immediate concern!

This notice was posted inside the door in the bathroom stall. Thank goodness I’m not a coffee drinker because I think this particular factoid is bordering on too much information!

I’ve had a small discoloration on my cheek that I’ve been watching for the last few months. It seemed to me that it’s gotten somewhat more pronounced over time and I was planning to see a dermatologist in Egypt before all the upheaval. I saw one here today instead.

I’d love to be able to say that I had overreacted, but no. The doctor took one look at my face and also a patch of my chest – with her naked eye – and told me I needed to have a rather aggressive sounding treatment that involved basically peeling off all the damaged skin. One cream she suggested was actually a radioactive chemotherapy cream.

When I was younger, if there was sunscreen around no one I knew had heard of it. My mother actually liked it when I got sunburned because she liked to peel skin (gross, huh?) No one really gave any thought to sun except to go out and sun bathe. Tanned skin is healthy, right?

Being the mother of two red headed children living in the Middle East, land of never ending sun, I have always been very protective of their skin. They each have a UV protection sun swim suit that provides 98% protection. I get them from a company in Australia called StingRay. The suits aren’t super cheap, but StingRay do free shipping to the whole world and when you weigh the cost of the suit against long term skin health, I think they are totally worth it.

As for me, all I can say is that if the universe only gives you as many problems / challenges as you can handle then I must be stronger than I think…

The last couple of months have been difficult to say the least – it’s very hard to live your life when you don’t know what is going to happen next. Will my family move back to the US permanently or will we try to go back to life in Egypt in the autumn? If we stay, should I start looking for someplace of my own to live? Where? Which of course leads to the question of whether or not I should look for a job.

My husband is looking for jobs of course, but he’s been working in a fairly specialized field for a long time and the jobs at his level are few and far between. I have the opposite problem: I have a master’s degree in my field but next to no practical working experience since I’ve been a full time wife and mother for the last decade. Entry level would likely be all I could qualify for, which is fine, only even then I probably don’t look so good on paper next to a shiny new college graduate. Knowing how the game is played going in makes reading job ads a fairly depressing exercise in what is very much an employers’ market. I know that I could learn to do all that an employer might require, but getting the chance to prove myself is the trick.

Here’s the cover letter I’d like to write:

To Whom It May Concern:

I am writing in response to your ad for ____________________. As you can see on my resume (attached) I have a bachelor’s degree (with honors) and a Master’s in Library Science. Shortly after graduation, I worked for two years in corporate libraries doing online research and organizing their specialized collections before I moved abroad.

I did not work in a library setting in my decade abroad, but nonetheless I honed many valuable skills. As a full time mother and wife, I became a champion multi-tasker. I can do laundry, dishes, cook dinner, and help with homework simultaneously while also chatting online with friends across the world. Time management is another area of strength: I can not only keep my own schedule but those of two active children in my head. I can take care of a family of four including housework, homework, eleven hours of tennis lessons per week, two nights of soccer practice plus two Saturday soccer games (fall only), and still find time for two evenings of yoga classes.

Food management is also a talent: I can make a tasty and nutritious dinner in half an hour from assorted and seemingly unrelated ingredients lurking in my refrigerator and pantry. Need last minute snacks for a class / soccer team? No problem, I’ve got you covered whether you require healthy / fun / convenient / vegan / allergy friendly food.

I also possess incredible attention to detail. Nothing escapes my notice: stains, leftovers, homework / chores left undone, dust bunnies. Need something found? Just ask me. I know where everything in my house is at any given moment. Need confirmation? Just ask my husband or children.

Some might call all of the above talents micromanaging. I just call it efficiency.

As a mother I have honed and expanded my interests in science and health matters: I can now diagnose and treat a variety of illnesses and identify those which require more specialized attention. I have also gained considerable skill in psychological counseling and support. Note: I am not licensed to practice either of these skills outside the bounds of my own family or the sideline of a tennis court / soccer field.

In my time abroad I have traveled extensively which has taught me to appreciate other cultures. Traveling has also allowed me to learn how to navigate airports, bargain in souks, and communicate by way of charades and smiles. I have been to over ten countries and have paid for the tickets and related expenses by making and selling quilts. In addition to quilting, I am also moderately talented in costume design. If ever you require a handmade Tudor-style velvet hat, I have a pattern.

In addition to my many domestic talents, I have also written and published four novels both digitally and in print as well maintaining a website, an active blog, and an alter ego for the last four years. In short, yes, I can type and have good computer and communication skills.

On second thought, nevermind. I withdraw my application for your position. I see now that I am over-qualified. Thank you for your consideration and best of luck in finding the right applicant to suit your needs.

Excuse me while I go out to buy a lottery ticket…

My daughter has been asking to go bowling since we arrived back in the US, but Saturday was such a lovely day – clear blue skies and nearly 60F – that I wanted to do something outside. My friend had told me about a bicycle trail that starts a few blocks from her house and runs along the Miami River. Since she happens to have enough bicycles in the correct sizes for us, that is what we decided to do.

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I haven’t actually been on anything other than an exercise bike since college so it took me a few minutes to get back in the swing. It was a scary moment when I forgot that the brakes were on the handlebars and not the pedal!!

As you can see by the debris on both sides of the trail, the river was pretty high fairly recently. The city has a series of levees and damns to guard against flooding.

This is pretty much as much as I saw of my son for most of the ride. He was doing his best impression of Elliot from ET, jacket flapping behind him, as I did more of a Mary Poppins thing on my city cruiser bike. He was having a blast riding up ahead and then coming back to tell us what was coming next. I didn’t mind – I am always looking for ways for him to spend some of his excess energy!

As beautiful as the trail was in winter, I can’t wait to see it when the trees leaf out again.

We were enjoying ourselves so much that we rode past the first park we came to and ended up in the next neighboring city. I estimate that we rode about 16 miles round trip – though my son easily added a few miles to his own ride with all the back and forth! Coming back wasn’t quite as much fun as going because we were riding into the wind but I was motivated to get back – I had worked up quite an appetite by then!

When we came inside, I had a tall glass of water and a rest. The children? They stayed outside to play some more and did a few more laps around the block on their bikes. Oh, to be young again…

It’s been a busy week here in southern Ohio. I bought a manual transmission car AND learned to drive it – I think I’ve pretty much done it all at this point: starting on a slope; stalling the engine at an intersection; driving up a hill; driving in mist, on the highway in driving rain, and also in snow flurries. I even put gas in it the other day A week ago I wouldn’t have thought it possible that I’d be tooling around in a five-speed like I knew what I was doing. Go me!

I also enrolled the children in a very nice local elementary school. The transition for them has not been without its bumps – neither child knew the Pledge of Allegiance for instance, and the way they teach handwriting in the British system is very different from the American system – but they have both found a few friends and overall seem to be adjusting fine. The first words out of my daughter’s mouth when I picked her up after school yesterday were, “Every day it gets better.” After all the turmoil of the last month, hearing her say that really made me feel good.

I truly hope that by getting us all into a routine, I’ll be able to get back to writing again soon. As you might expect, I’ve been a little busy and distracted (and stressed and depressed) lately.

Today I will make some calls and try to arrange some tennis lessons for the children. Both the children are extremely high energy and the lack of organized sports and the cold drippy weather hasn’t made it very easy for them to expend as much energy as *I* would like them to. Fingers crossed that I’ll be able to arrange for at least one lesson a week. Next on the agenda is a community soccer league and a YMCA membership for swimming.

The weekend – who knows? Maybe I’ll just load them up and hit the highway. I’ve got wheels now so the possibilities are endless. Well, not really but it doesn’t sound as good to say “the possibilities are limited to a 50 mile radius and a budget of $20.”

This week Ohio, next week…Ohio…

I first heard this song in relation to the World Cup (duh!) and downloaded it for my daughter because it’s a fun song and she loves loves loves soccer. We were listening to music on our drive to Ohio on Wednesday and it came on and it was like I was hearing the words for the first time:

You’re on the frontline
Everyone’s watching
You know it’s serious
We’re getting closer
This isnt over

Tsamina mina
Zangalewa
Cuz this is Africa

With all the stress I’ve been under lately, being separated from my husband, and missing being in my own space and routine and Egypt, I admit this happy tune made me weep.

If it were only me, I’d be back in Egypt already, but as it is, I have to do what is the best for my children. I will be going on a tour of a local elementary school on Monday to start the process of getting the children back into a real school routine and will also be shopping for a car shortly. I guess I really am going to be here for a while…

It’s been nearly an entire month since I evacuated Cairo with my family. When I left, I had no idea how long we might be away. I had to prepare myself for the idea we might lose everything, but deep down I sincerely hoped that we were overreacting by leaving when we did and that we would be able to return in a few weeks and pick up (mostly) where we left off.

I’m not stupid – I know enough about history and political science to have known that even if the protesters got what they wanted that there would be more bumps to come in the transition process from the old regime to whatever came next. The protesters against the old regime had one goal; once they achieved that goal there would likely be multiple, possibly conflicting, goals for the future.

Still, it has been very hard to make any decisions on what to do next. While the news from the region is not encouraging, what with Libya and Bahrain and Iran all staging their own protests, the news from neighbors and friends who either stayed behind or have already gone back has been the opposite. With every cheery Facebook post about resuming school, extracurricular activities, or social events, I wonder why it is I ever left.

In spite of the reality in front of me, I want so much for their message to be the true one.

I went to visit a good friend over the weekend, who works with the US State Department and left her post in Cairo last June for a new post. She in turn has a friend who lives in a building only a few doors down from me in Cairo. When the mosques made their announcements on Saturday 1/29 recommending that people be prepared to guard their homes against looters because the police were not on duty, a call from this women resulted in several armed Egyptian soldiers to be posted along our street. At the time I was under the impression she had called because she was nervous – in fact she called because she saw looters coming down the street. When she called for help, she was told that there was no one to send to her so she barricaded herself in a bedroom and hoped for the best. The looters came into her building but were chased off by the soldiers before they got in her place – only three buildings down from where I was sleeping with my own children.

In hindsight, I’m fairly glad I didn’t know about this incident in detail at the time because I was nervous enough as it was but this story did do one thing for me: it helped me to embrace my decision to stay in the US with the children for the time being.

I am driving to Ohio today to stay with an old friend and put my kids in school. Do I wish I could resume my life in Cairo? Sure. The problem is that life as I knew it doesn’t currently exist – the children’s school is only at 1/3 capacity for students, the club where they take tennis lessons is closed, and the streets are not entirely safe. My husband’s shuttle from work was diverted on his first day back in town because a policeman shot a bus driver during an argument only a few blocks from our house, not at all a typical occurrence. How could I go back and put my children on a bus to school and trust that they would be safe?

For now I will do what I can to give my children a safe and normal place to go to school for a few months and do what I can to find some sports activities for them. I am no substitute for a real teacher and as much as I rant, I am certainly no coach. They need some routine and normalcy in their lives. So do I. I’m a planner at heart but I’m doing my best not to get too far ahead of myself and take things one step at a time. Wish me luck…

It is hard to believe that I’ve been in Maryland for nearly an entire month already – where does time go? No, seriously – where does it go???

I wasn’t really up for much sightseeing before because I’ve been just a titch stressed out, but since this weekend will likely be our last in Maryland I decided we needed to make an effort to see a few of the bigger attractions. I mean really – Washington DC is right there. So Saturday morning my sister and BIL and I gathered everyone up and we went to the National Zoo.

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It was a little gray outside, but not too cold so all in all fairly pleasant. I never normally think of going to a zoo in the winter time, but unless it is truly cold and snowy winter weather, it’s a good time to go to the zoo because the animals are all out frolicking and not limp from the sun and heat – the children either!

We had only just arrived when a man who was passing told us that the lion cubs were out playing so we ought to go there first, before they went inside. As it turned out the lion cubs were way on the other side of the zoo, but it was worth the hike to get there – they were so cute!

Apparently toddlers of all species like to chew things!

There were two lionesses and about six cubs, who were all romping around below while the daddy lion sat up on the hill alone. Every now and again one cub would go and try to get his attention.

You can see how well the daddy lion reacted to these overtures!

The only thing more entertaining than the lion cubs was the nearby bronze dinosaur skull. Who could resist this pose? I’ve been to three big zoos in the last year and I think I’ve enjoyed the bronze statuary as much as seeing the live animals.

They are not the most exotic of creatures, but prairie dogs are so cute! We gave them nearly as much time as the lion cubs. I’d be embarrassed to tell you how many pictures of prairie dogs I’ve taken in the last year between the Minneapolis Zoo and this one.

I honestly try very hard not to take too many pictures in zoos because what’s the point? Yes, the animals are cute but how many of those kinds of pictures do I need cluttering up my computer? I couldn’t resist this red panda though. They kind of look like a cross between a raccoon and a fox. Their coat is so plush and you might not be surprised to learn I am partial to red heads!

We left the zoo just before it closed at 4:30pm and drove down into Washington DC so that I could at least see, if not explore, the main attractions. It was interesting to see the White House and the Capital Building in person, having seen pictures so often on TV / in movies. Mostly I was amazed by how close everything was together! Of course “close” is relative – we walked around for about 1 1/2 hours and didn’t see nearly everything there was to see. One day we’ll have to go back and tour the Smithsonian museums (though I don’t suppose they’d let me pose with my head in a dinosaur jaw there!)

The first question out of my son’s mouth was “Is the Washington Monument taller than the pyramids?”

Given all the Masonic symbolism in Washington DC, I should have known that was a trick(y) questions. I looked it up when we got home, and yes, it is taller than the Great Pyramid. I also learned several other interesting and possibly disturbing facts about the layout of Washington DC. This would be great stuff if I were a conspiracy theorist or a thriller writer (though I suppose it’s been done to death already) Take them with a grain of salt…

The sun was going down by the time we reached the Lincoln Memorial. As you can see behind me, the reflecting pool is drained for renovation – even the WWII memorial fountains were turned off for winter. Bad timing for me. I’m sure the minute I leave the area all the cherry blossoms will burst into flower too.

The sun was down by the time we left the Lincoln Memorial but the Vietnam Memorial was still a moving sight – so many names.

It was a long day, but one very well spent introducing my children to some of their own country’s national monuments for a change. Both children were born abroad and have never actually lived in the US – its probably just as well for to have a crash course in American history since it looks like we’re going to be here for a while…

The sleet on Monday afternoon ended up delaying my husband’s flight out to London by two hours, but the children sure did appreciate the overnight snow the next day. Ever the mom, I used the snow as the carrot to get them to do their school workbooks. It was amazing how efficient and cooperative they were about it, with the fresh shiny snow beckoning them.

I admit it – after a decade in the desert, I’m not much of a cold weather person. I like the idea of it more than I like the reality. But after the last few weeks, we all needed a little bit of levity to break up all the tension. After the school work was done and we’d all had a snack, I walked the children up to a nearby community park.

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This is my snow angel. What? You didn’t actually think I was going to LAY IN THE SNOW did you??

There is something irresistible about fresh snow.

The only picture I would allow of me right now.

When you walk from place to place and really look, nature always offers something beautiful to look at no matter where you are.

I saw these before the snowfall – they are even prettier with the snow filling.

I don’t expect the snow to last all that long, but we’ll enjoy it while it lasts. I’ll be especially grateful if the cold temperatures and the snow play encourages my children to sleep earlier at night…