Jenyfer Matthews

I gave myself a pedicure today – long overdue. I won’t give you details about just how much dry skin I sloughed off my heels but it wasn’t pretty. And it got me to thinking about just what is up with that?? My feet never used to require so much maintenance.

I attributed it to the climate – for a while. I mean, I do live in a desert and so more often than not I wear open sandals. It’s bound to be hard on the feet to be exposed to the elements so much. But now that I’m in Cairo where it actually is cold in the winter, my feet have been in socks and closed shoes for the last three months and they are worse than ever. That leaves me with only one logical explanation.

Age.

It makes sense. My feet were much lower maintenance ten years ago. And my children run around barefoot as much as I will let them and they have lovely feet. So the only answer left is that my feet have lost the blush of youth. I was so unprepared for that.

You don’t see a lot of advertising on beauty products specifically for feet. Unless shoes are considered a beauty product. Hmmm…that’s an intriguing thought. As if I needed another reason to indulge my love of beautiful shoes…

On the topic of shoes, I found a great website for teaching children to tie shoes – I even learned a few new tricks myself!

And after I resorted to the age old mother’s trick of bribery my daughter is finally learning to tie her own shoes. Money well spent in my opinion.

I’m not sure what it is about mother-daughter relationships that can be so difficult at times. Maybe it’s all the hormones flying around. Maybe it’s understanding each other a little too well. Maybe it’s that my daughter is a nut.

First of all, she’s seven going on thirty. You know the kid at school who teaches all the other kids the rude gestures and words? The one that tells anyone who will listen all she knows about sex (which isn’t much) That’s my girl!

And believe it or not, she didn’t get it from me. Well, not all of it.

That stuff I can roll my eyes and live with. The thing about my daughter that drives me batty is her gender identity crisis. She does her level best to act and dress like a boy at all times.

Outside of school (god bless uniforms!) she lives in nylon soccer shorts or sweats and loose tshirts. She won’t wear anything that’s the least bit fitted, nothing with a v-neck, nothing with glitter or sparkles or anything in any shade of pink or purple. I can’t tell you how many perfectly good clothes I’ve ended up giving away because she flat out rejects them. I recently put a moratorium on anyone buying her new clothes because it’s a waste of time and money.

I can’t reason with her. I’ve tried pointing out that I’m not a girly-girly either. I prefer jeans to skirts and red to pink myself. And yet, no one has ever mistaken me for a boy. She’s even complimented me on my clothes from time to time but does she follow my lead? Nope.

She has lovely chestnut hair that she refuses to let me style. She barely tolerates my brushing it. I took her to the barber and cut it in a short boy style once, in a fit of frustration. I loved it because I could finally see her lovely cheeks and beautiful smile. But everyone thought she was a boy so now we’re growing it out again. The irony is that many boys we know are also growing their hair out so she blends right in.

You know, I could live with her dressing like a boy if that was the extent of it. The ironic thing is, whether she realizes it or not, she’s excruciatingly girly in other ways. She agonizes over what to wear days in advance of an event. She rejects everything in her closet and weeps because she has “nothing” to wear. She loves shopping for shoes.

Hmmm…maybe there is hope for her yet…

It’s getting cold enough in Cairo that I can wear some of my winter clothes. Including my very favorite sweater of all time.

Dare I tell you how old my favorite sweater is? (14!) My sister bought it for me for Christmas (by request) the year I graduated from college. It was love at first sight. It was stylish and hip then, and like most really classic designs, it still is.

She bought it in a mall in Louisiana and I brought it along to Ohio and to North Carolina before packing it up and shipping it to the United Arab Emirates. Okay – not a real wintery place, but I thought it might get cold in the desert at night. (It does) Because of the fact that I have lived in such warm places, it gets worn infrequently and I *have* to lay it flat to dry because we don’t have a clothes dryer. Perhaps it has held up better than it might have over time because of these things.

It’s the color of oatmeal so it goes with nearly everything. And it has a fun dangly fringe along the bottom. It looks good layered and on its own. I can’t wait to see how it looks with my new shoes This isn’t all in my head – I still get compliments when I wear it.

I have to say that there are few pieces in my wardrobe that have had such longevity. Things either wear out or go out of style or I simply get tired of being seen wearing them. One benefit of moving so much is that I have an ever shifting audience so in my mind, my wardrobe feels “fresh” even when it’s not.

That last fact perhaps is in my mind. I was wearing the sweater recently when an American neighbor of mine complimented me on it. She kept looking at me and then said, “Did you get that sweater at {store name}? In the early 90s? My sister had one sort of like that.”

I guess if nothing else, the above encounter does demonstrate that it’s a sweater that definitely makes an impression!

A little Wine, Sunshine Help Boost Women’s Health

“The data showed that, in comparison with the baseline period, consumption of both red and white wines increased serum [blood] HDL cholesterol (often called ‘good’ cholesterol), which suggests a cardio-protective effect,” said the report in the November issue of the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition.Add in the antioxidants from chocolate and this is a lifestyle I can truly embrace!

So I’m going to post a funny list a friend sent me. I am going to have to try a few of these out. Anything you’d like to add?

How to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity

At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

Page yourself over the intercom. Don’t disguise your voice.

Every time some one asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

Put your garbage can on your desk and label it “In.”

Put decaf in the coffee pot for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

In the memo field of all your checks, write “For Smuggling Diamonds”

Finish all your sentences with “In Accordance With the Prophecy.”

Don’t use any punctuation

As often as possible, skip rather than walk

Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face

Specify that your drive-through order is “To Go.”

Sing along at the opera

Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don’t rhyme

Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day

Five days in advance, tell your friends you can’t attend their party because you’re not in the mood

Have your co-workers address you by your wrestling name, rock bottom

When the money comes out the ATM, scream “I won!, I won!”

When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling “run for your lives, they’re loose!!”

Tell your children over dinner. “due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go.”

Having some external deadlines has forced me to be even more organized than usual. Today I:

1) Went grocery shopping

2) Worked on the edits for ALL THE WAY HOME

3) Pieced much of two baby quilts for the bazaar next week

4) Helped both children with their homework

5) Made a totally killer homemade tomato sauce and lasagna

I was feeling pretty on top of things. Then my daughter asked me why it was that I don’t work.

Sigh… See who gets cookies tomorrow and who DOES NOT!!!
Mwhahahaha!!!!

If you can start the day without caffeine, boring people with your troubles, day and be grateful for it, blame without resentment education and never correct him,

If you can get going without pep pills,

If you can always be cheerful, ignoring aches and pains,

If you can resist complaining and

If you can eat the same food every

If you can understand when your loved ones are too busy to give you any time,

If you can take criticism and

If you can ignore a friend’s limited

If you can resist treating a rich friend better than a poor friend,

If you can conquer tension without medical help,

If you can relax without liquor,

If you can sleep without the aid of drugs,

…Then You Are Probably The Family Dog!

Every day, several times a day I check my email. And lately, there’s been this MetLife banner ad across the top. Maybe you’ve seen it. The text is: “If we tie the knot… If she’s eating for two…”

Okay, sure, life insurance is a good idea and there are worse ads that could be displayed across the top of my computer screen. But this particular ad uses images of Snoopy and Woodstock to illustrate its text. Am I the only one who is a little weirded out by the thought of Snoopy and Woodstock shacking up and starting a family???

A friend sent this to me recently and it was just too funny not to share!

A Mom’s Song by Anita Renfroe (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VlY8STkhopc)

It has recently come to my attention that some friends and acquaintances have been using me as an example of how they would like to spend their next vacation.

Let me explain. My husband and I tend to take separate vacations. It’s not something that we planned, exactly, it just sort of happened. See, he likes to take advantage of the fact that we live abroad and are in closer proximity to other parts of the world by spending his annual vacation exploring someplace new. Since that would be difficult to do with the children in tow, he usually goes on his own. I prefer to take the kids and go visit family.

Then it occurred to me that it wasn’t fair that he should have all the fun – footloose and fancy free for a month while I travel on my own with the kids hither and yon, so I decided that I should get my turn away as well. At least once a year I take a week on my own and travel someplace with my friends. It started out several years ago with a 5 day trip to Egypt and this year ended up with 10 days in Germany. It’s not totally fair time-wise, no, but a girl’s gotta take the time she can get.

And I do make the most of my time.

So, a neighbor told me recently that she tried this idea out on her husband and suggested that she would like to take a weekend away with some of her girlfriends. Her husband was not enthusiastic about the plan and she gave up the idea after getting the cold shoulder for three days. Another friend told me that it was her husband encouraging her to go away with her friends. Apparently he likes to be on his own. She also declined the suggestion.

Whether or not these couples decide that separate travels are their cup of tea is beside the point. What I find ironic is that anyone should use me as any sort of a good example.

I’m pretty well used to being used as a bad example. I’ve been accused of being a bad influence on people ever since I was in grade school. I never did anything to deserve that reputation (well, not much!) but I must just have some sort of disreputable aura. My teachers and friends’ parents were often suspicious of me. My friends’ boyfriends never trusted me either, though I never did anything to lead anyone astray.

The fact that my best friend broke it off with her boyfriend the morning after she and I went out to eat together this summer was just a coincidence, no matter what he thinks.

Honest.