Jenyfer Matthews

It’s hot!

No, I’m not talking about my latest book, but the weather. While you are freezing your …well, a tad chilly up in the northern hemisphere, we’ve got the summer dreams are made of here in the southern hemisphere. Very hot. But with it comes humidity.

And with that comes the inability to sit in my office and create stories. I mean it’s hot. The beach is only 5 minutes walk away. I should be lolling atop the waves, not slaving over a keyboard – right?

Wrong?

Motion creates immediacy creates words on page and eventually hopefully a story someone will love enough to buy.

So while one part of me shies away from my office and everything it involves – promotion, plotting, characterization for the new story, figuring out Mac’s back story and more importantly, coming up with a name I like for my heroine – it calls, and yes, smack my hand, I’m not listening. Talk to the hand!

The kids are out of school, they interrupt with wails of ‘I’m bored’ and yes, mother’s guilt sets in and I drag myself away from that heroine’s name that is on the tip of my singular brain cell that is battling to operate despite the incessant interruptions and heat and – heck, what am I saying – yes, it’s summer, I want a holiday, I want a break from edits and creativity, and let my brain rest.

For now…please. Just for a day or so more.

And here it comes again, that personal guilt and stress. Get writing, you might dry up, then where will you be?

And so tomorrow morning, my hero Mac Grainger is going to tell me exactly who he is, what he is up to, what he wants, and where he is going.

Do you hear me, Mac? Do you? Come on, don’t disappoint me – okay I’ll beg if I have to.

And so my self-enforced holiday is coming to a close rapidly. A break where I wasn’t meant to be doing anything but relaxing.

What’s that?

Relaxing was… editing, submitting, answering emails, and the occasional game of solitaire. Oh, and plus it was reading, something I had sorely neglected during the year. I promised myself in my break I would read, and I did.

So tomorrow at 6 a.m. (yes, I know, sounds disgusting!) I will be up and still in PJs, but at the computer and the words will flow from the tips of my fingers to the computer page. They of course will make wonderful sense, be perfectly formed sentences, no typos, the heroine will be to die for, and the heroine will shine.

And if you believe that, you’re on the same planet as me.

So have you started your goals for the year? What are they? And more importantly, how are you going to get there? Leave a comment and let me know what you’re up to.

Happy reading and writing everyone, and let’s make 2009 a year to write screed and screeds and read just as much.

PS: A very exciting thing to start off 2009. NO SEX NECESSARY is out in print. Read an excerpt…you know you want to

It’s been a while since I’ve visited Blogthings. This test result is interesting, but now (freak that I am), I feel pressure! Obviously I have no one to blame but myself if I fail to succeed in my life…though I suppose that could be said of anyone!

Your Spiritual Number is One

You bring a strong, positive energy into other people’s lives. Your intentions are pure, and because of this, you are powerful when you act. Right now, your life is both about new beginnings and closure. It’s not an understatement to say that your whole world is changing. No matter what comes to pass, you are ready to tackle it. You have the ambition and drive to have your life turn out the way you want it to.

I definitely wasn’t looking for a new blog to follow, but this one was just too good to pass up. I ran across the link on the Paperback Writer blog this week. Called Less is More, it’s the blog of a SAHM who is pledging not to buy anything new (retail) for an entire year. It’s early days yet, but by her report, so far so good.

I suppose one of the reasons that I am interested in this blog is because I myself love to make due with what’s at hand rather than go out and spend money all the time – and not only because I’m in Egypt and my options are somewhat limited! Using something that you already have or making something new out of something old is (for me) a satisfying process.

As a result of reading this blog, I learned about another really cool sounding thing called The Freecycle Network – a nonprofit organization dedicated to “reuse and keeping good stuff out of landfills”. I really love this idea! I do this on a very informal basis every time I pass along my children’s clothes to someone with young children. Imagine having an entire community with whom to do trades.

In our crunched economy, being a bit more circumspect about spending money isn’t a bad thing. No matter what the economy is like, recycling just makes sense.

For a long time when I would go to the deli counter at my local grocery store to get sliced cheese, they would just pull packages they had prepared in advance out from under the counter. That was fine by me – I got what I wanted without having to wait around.

Lately though, they haven’t been as prepared. And I’ve discovered something that I could have lived without knowing : They only wear one glove when they are slicing the cheese.

Why only one? If they were worried about hygiene wouldn’t they put on both gloves? They are at least wearing the glove on their left hand (the potty hand in Islam practices) but still – I don’t really care to have them pick the rind off the gouda with the bare fingernail of their other hand.

Once, when the regular deli guy was out, a stock clerk stepped behind the counter to help me and donned the one glove. Just as he was about to commence slicing, someone asked him a question so he stopped what he was doing and started digging through packages of pasta on the shelves in search of something. When he was finished, he stepped behind the counter to start on my order – without changing the glove he’d just touched all those packages with. I couldn’t help myself and decided to request he change his glove. It took a minute for it to compute with him but he did finally change the glove he was wearing – though he looked exasperated while he did it. I tried not to think too hard where the other hand had been. (No, he hadn’t washed his hands either time he stepped behind the counter)

I overheard a woman at my regular vegetable stand telling a friend that she soaks her salad fixings in bleach for ten minutes and then ten minutes more in water, just to be sure that she’s killed all the bacteria and parasites that might be lurking. Bleach? I think she’s going to kill herself one day as well. I clean my salad in vinegar and water and it seems to do the trick. I’m into my third year of living in Cairo and I’ve yet to catch anything terribly serious – and that is with eating the unwashed fruit and questionably handled food that my friendly green grocery is always offering me. Even the buffalo latte didn’t make me sick. Besides, if you think about it, a little intestinal distress could be considered on par with a high colonic. Some people pay big money to get cleaned out that way.

Still, I can’t help but wonder what the bleach woman would think if she saw the one gloved cheese man…

What can I say – dinner on Friday was spectacular. My friends made reservations for us at a Cairo landmark, the Mena House Hotel. My only regret is that I didn’t bring my camera along because the decor was nothing short of spectacular. Next year, in lieu of presents, I’d like to stay a night there. I fear it may require more than one year of present sacrifice however.

It was that nice.

We dined in the Mogul Room which served the best Indian food I may ever have had the pleasure to consume. After our meal, the staff came to our table with a birthday cake so smooth, so rich in its bittersweet chocolate decadence, that its main ingredient must have been pure chocolate sin. The band even played “Happy Birthday” for me – which sounds really funky on Indian instruments! At least the restaurant was too classy a place for silly hats!

I noticed something interesting on the menu. It’s not news that restaurants mark-up beverages – I think I once read somewhere that beverages are where they make the best profits. The wine list was almost entirely comprised of locally produced wines. I know first hand that few of them are remarkable and I have actually stopped buying them for the most part because they are just not worth it at nearly $8 bottle. I almost giggled when I looked at the wine list and saw this same $8 wine being listed for nearly $40 bottle! I was mildly shell-shocked at the mark-up and was having trouble making a choice, knowing all I know about the quality of the product. My friend suggested a wine made in Egypt with Lebanese grapes. It was one of the best I’ve had here. So good that I looked for it in our neighborhood liquor store. After having paid close to $50 a bottle at the restaurant, finding it for $12 seemed like a real bargain!

And this is what my hubby got me as a present while he was in Italy in December. He thought that it was a tiny bit more practical than the red patent leather purse he’d gotten me in the spring. He’s right and I love it. It’s so soft I just want to pet it all the time…

Another year down the drain. Yes, it’s my birthday this weekend but I can’t seem to work up the enthusiasm about it that my children do about theirs.

Different places celebrate birthdays in different ways – some of these traditions make the cake and candles routine look quite dull:

Africa – Initiation Ceremonies. In various African nations they hold initiation ceremonies for groups of children instead of birthdays. When children reach a certain designated age, they learn the laws, beliefs, customs, songs and dances of their tribes.

Argentina – Dance the waltz at 15. When girls turn 15 they have a huge party and dance the waltz with their father and other boys.

Aruba – Children take a treat to school for their classmates and all teachers. Each teacher receives a treat and gives the birthday child a small gift like a pencil, an eraser or a postcard. The birthday child is also allowed to wear special clothes instead of the school uniform.

Bolivia – Dance the waltz and wear white. At the age of 16 the birthday girl wears a white dress and dances the waltz with her father and other boys.

Brazil – Pulls on the earlobe. The birthday child receives a pull on the earlobe for each year they have been alive. The birthday person also gives the first slice of cake to his/her most special friend or relative, usually mom or dad. At the age of 15, the girl dances a waltz with staring with her father and grandfather. She dances with a total of 15 partners each symbolizing a year of her life.

Canada – Greasing the nose with butter or margarine. In Atlantic Canada (Nova Scotia, Prince Edward Island, New Brunswick and Newfoundland) the birthday child is ambushed and their nose is greased for good luck. The greased nose makes the child too slippery for bad luck to catch them. This tradition is reputed to be of Scottish decent. Birthday punches. In Quebec the birthday person receives a punch for each year they are alive and then one for good luck.

China – Noodles for Lunch. The birthday child pays respect to his/her parents and receives a gift of money. Friends and relatives are invited to lunch and noodles are served to wish the birthday child a long life.

Cuba – Food, music, pinatas and lots of people. The celebrations are very similar to the United States; food, decorations, gifts, pinatas, cake, candles, “happy birthday” song and games. But a lot of people are invited including neighbors, friends, co-workers and family even if they don’t have kids around the birthday child’s age.

Denmark – Flying Flags. A flag is flown outside a window to designate that someone who lives in that house is having a birthday. Presents are placed around the child’s bed while they are sleeping so they will see them immediately upon awakening.

Ecuador – Pink Dress. When a girl turns 15 there is a great celebration and the girl wears a pink dress. The father puts on the birthday girls first pair of high heels and dances the waltz with her while 14 maids and 14 boys also dance the waltz.

England – Fortune Telling Cakes and Bumps. Certain symbolic objects are mixed into the birthday cake as it being prepared. If your piece of cake has a coin in it, then you will be rich. Also, when its your birthday your friends give you the “bumps” they lift you in the air by your hands and feet and raise you up and down to the floor, one for each year then one for luck, two for luck and three for the old man’s coconut!

Germany – Candles left burning for the day. A member of the birthday person’s family wakes up at sunrise and lights the candles on the birthday cake. There are as many candles as the years of age of the birthday person plus one for good luck. The candles are left burning all day long. After dinner that night then everyone sings the birthday song and the birthday person blows out the candles. If all of the candles are blown out in one try then the wish of the birthday person will come true. Presents are then opened and the party starts.

Germany – Sweeping the stairs of city hall. When men reach the age of 30 and they still don’t have a girlfriend that they have to sweep the stairs of the city hall. All there friends will throw rubble on the stairs and when you’re finished they’ll throw some more rubble there. This way every girl can see that this man reached the age of 30 and still doesn’t have a girlfriend (and that he can clean a house very well!).

Ghana – Special foods. The foods eaten are watche (brown rice and beans), sheto (black pepper), mecko (red pepper), red rice with corn beef and fufu (pounded yam and cassava).

Guyana – Special dishes. Chicken, duck or lamb curry with rice are the main dishes at the birthday celebration. A family member usually bakes a fruit, black or sponge for the birthday boy/girl to cut. The person celebrating their birthday will wear something fancy.

Holland – Crown Years. Special year birthdays such as 5, 10, 15, 20, 21 are called “crown” years. The birthday child receives an especially large gift on a crown year birthday. The family also decorates the birthday child’s chair at the dining room table with seasonal flowers or paper streamers, paper flowers and balloons. At school the birthday child can give their classmates something to eat and the teacher makes the child a birthday hat, often made of paper streamers or paper flowers.

Hungary – Pull on the earlobes. When gifts are open, everyone pulls on the earlobes of the birthday person and says a little rhyme. The rhyme is translated into English as follows “God bless you, live so long so your ears reach your ankles”.

India – Colored dress and chocolates. At school the birthday child wears a colored dress and passes out chocolates to the entire class, with the help of a trusted friend.

Ireland – Birthday Bumps. The birthday child is lifted upside down and “bumped” on the floor for good luck. The number of bumps given is the age of the child plus one for extra good luck.

Israel - Chair Raising. A small child sits in a chair while grown-ups raise and lower it a number of times corresponding to the child’s age, plus one for good luck.

Italy – Pulling ears. The child’s ears are pulled as many times as how old they are turning.

Japan – New Clothes. The birthday child wears entirely new clothes to mark the occasion. Certain birthdays are more important than others and these are celebrated with a visit to the local shrine.

Latvia – Lifting the chair. The birthday person sits in a chair and friends and familiy lift the chair one time for each year. The traditional birthday cake is a yellow cake called “klingeris”.

Lithuania – Garlands and lifting the chair.A garland is hung around the entire door of the home of the birthday person. The birthday person sits in a decorated chair and family members lift them up to three times.

Mexico – Piñatas. The piñata, usually made out of paper mache and in the form of an animal, is filled with goodies and hung from the ceiling. The birthday child is blindfolded and hits the piñata until it is cracked open. All the children share the goodies. The song Las Mananitas is sung. Also, when a daugher is 15, the birthday is celebrated with a special mass in her honor. A party is then given to introduce her to everyone as a young woman. The father dances a waltz with her.

Nepal -Mark on the forehead. A certain mixture of rice yogurt and color is placed on the birthday child’s forehead for good luck.

New Zealand – Birthday claps. After the birthday cake is lit, the happy birthday song is sung loudly and often out of tune and then the person birthday person receives a clap for each year they have been alive and then one for good luck.

Norway – Birthday day. The birthday child stands out in front of their class and chooses a friend to share a little dance while the rest of the class sings a happy birthday song.

Panama – Piñatas and large parties. The piñata is the most important item. They are usually made to resemble a character to correspond with a theme. It is filled with candy and confetti and is either hit with a stick or there are ribbons on it to pull. When the cake is served, the happy birthday song is often performed in two languages, Spanish and English. The cake is served with ice cream. The extended family is invited and sometimes up to 100 children are invited.

Philippines – Mixture of East and West. Birthday cakes are baked in various sizes and shapes. The celebration includes noodles representing long life, balloon decorations and pinatas. Earlier in the day the family goes to hear Mass and to thank God.

Puerto Rico – Taps on the arm. The child gets tapped on the arm for each birth year. A big party which includes a formal dinner is held.

Russia – Birthday Pies. Instead of a birthday cake, many Russian child receive a birthday pie with a birthday greeting carved into the crust.

Scotland – A pound note and a soft smack. A pound note is given for every year old the child is plus an additional pound for good luck. A soft smack on the bottom is also given for each year.

South Africa – Presentation of a key at age twenty-one. On the twenty-first birthday a key made of anything from paper to aluminum foil to silver to gold is presented by the parents as a sign that the child is ready to unlock the door to their future.

United States – Cake, candles and song. A cake is made, and candles are put on top based on how old the person is. Then everyone sings the “happy birthday” song, and at the end of the song, the birthday child blows out the candles. If they blow them all out with one blow, their birthday wishes will come true.

Uruguay – A waltz at age 15 for a girl. The principal ritual of a birthday is the cake with candles and lights out, with the eternal song “Happy Birthday to you…” At the end of the song, the birthday person blows out the candles and all guests applaud or cheer, some make jokes, whistle loudly, and touch the birthday person’s shoulder or head. When a girl reaches the age of 15, she puts on a formal dress and dances a waltz with possible suitors.

Vietnam – Everyones birthday is celebrated on new years day. Not only is Tet the beginning of a New Year, it is also everyone’s birthday. The Vietnamese do not know or acknowledge the exact day they were born. A baby turns one on Tet no matter when he/she was born that year. Children say they were born in the year of the symbol of the lunar calendar for that year. On the first morning of Tet, adults congratulate children on becoming a year older by presenting them with red envelopes that contain “Lucky Money,” or li xi. These envelopes are given to the children by parents, siblings, relatives and close friends.

I could live with wearing a pink dress and dancing the waltz, but I’m sure glad I’m not in Canada at the moment. And what’s with all the ear lobe pulling? Ouch! As for leaving the candles burning all day – at my age that just sounds like a fire hazard (and imagine cleaning up all that wax!)

Do you have any birthday traditions? As long as it doesn’t involve hitting, pinching, or otherwise abusing the birthday person, I’d love to hear how you celebrate. Anything that makes this annual event more fun and distracts me from the real issue is a good thing!

Things will be a little different on the weekends this year. I’m still going to host blog guests and do Friday Features but it may not be every weekend. My evil plan is to keep you guessing – MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! (Unless of course you chose to consult the list up coming guests on the side bar and take all of the fun out it.)

This weekend it’s my birthday and so it’s going to be all about me. Tomorrow night some good friends have made reservations for us to go out to eat at a rather swanky Indian restaurant located in a hotel near the Pyramids. It’s a coat and tie sort of place – only Mr. Matthews was making a stink about having to wear a tie. Okay, I’ve never worn a tie so I can’t comment firsthand on whether or not they are comfortable, but come on. Is is really so bad? It’s not like anyone asked him to wear something truly uncomfortable, like a thong. How bad could it be?

Sometimes tantrums work though. My friend said she’d ask her husband not to wear a tie either. She figured the restaurant would think we were just being “Americans”. Hubby is happy, but I’d like to know when being American became synonymous with being a lazy slob?

I love the LOL cats and I imagine there are many authors (and editors) out there who will get a giggle out of this one.

My father loved the Terror Game – and he’s not an easy man to make laugh. The toy itself worked about as well as you might expect from a cheapo Chinese toy, but it turns out that my sister can do an uncanny impression of the laughing skull that kept us in stitches for days…

Thought I’d share a few pictures of how I spent my Christmas vacation. I went to Curves this week and I take it back – I’d rather be back in the woods snow-shoeing!

Sledding was a lot of fun too. Being the absurdly athletic sort, my daughter decided it was more fun to stand on her sled and snow board down. She was good at it too!








I’d like to say that I was “shooshing” to a stop here but that would be a lie. This picture was taken just before I crashed into my step-mother and her dog. But what a ride!

My latest resolution is never to set foot in Curves again. It’s not that it’s such a horrible place. It’s just that I don’t feel that I’m getting much out of the workout particularly and the people irritate me. I plan to go back to yoga tomorrow and also water aerobics when it starts again. I’ll supplement those workouts with home workouts. I know, I know – those home workouts never happen. But I’ve promised myself that I have to go back to Curves if I don’t do them. What better motivator could I have? And since one of my resolutions was to be nicer to myself this year, I think NOT going to Curves fits in nicely with that, don’t you?